OK. If I don’t stop and write, I’m going to explode. Life has been happening so fast that I can’t stop long enough to get my thoughts out, dang it. I might even lose a few pounds…that’s how much they build up when I don’t blog. Stupid.
Anywho…it’s performance season, so I’m in full prep mode for a huge, magical series of shows. In the midst of all that, my studio flooded Wednesday, which was a fun challenge. Then as the work crew was digging a trench to potentially solve my drainage issue, they broke a window. Good times.
Mom work never stops either. My 20 year old son moved out and into his own place this past week (exciting and emotional all at once!). My sweet girl’s mental health and wellness are ongoing priorities, as we still have frequent meltdowns and moments of concern (particularly when she’s hormonal…bless it, Lord Jesus). And, Y’all, we bought a horse. Seriously, it feels like I’m on TV. We should truly have a show.
On the professional front, I am wildly ambitious as usual, with big plans and goals. I make a lot of lists. I jot down many ideas. It’s time to pull the trigger on some of those, so I have to stay focused despite the demands of life. Wake up with determination, go to bed with satisfaction, right?
And finally, I’m trying to stay sane, be a good wife, and remember that kindness and gratitude are everything. Weekly therapy helps, and I recommend it for everyone.
A mom came in to the studio yesterday, and I spoke to her cheerfully and asked how she was doing. She said with a smile..
I’m just in survival mode.
..and, Y’all, she meant it. It’s where we all are. Gone are the days of “fine” and “we’re doing good”. Those are all pretty, fake, facade words we say instinctively. And probably on Facebook, just like this post by me, our lives look nice and shiny, organized, and full of good stuff.
We’re all a hot mess, though. Me especially. Woven through the daily work, the career goals, and the horses, are plenty of tearful struggles. There is stress. There is sleeplessness. There are hard decisions to make. There is risk and fear.
I guess I say all this to convey a truth right now that should not be lost on any of us…
We’re all in survival mode.
We are trying to make the best of our lives, give to our children, offer our best at work, and stay sane. Cut yourself some freaking slack, stop thinking everybody has it together but you, and quit chasing the idea that you MUST make everything perfect and seamless. It ain’t happening.
Enjoy your day. Feel the sunshine on your face. Listen to your kids giggle. Throw a load of clothes in the washer if you have a minute. Do your best to maintain. Use your energy to just survive, and try to do it as thoughtfully and with gratitude as you can. It’s all we’ve got.
Hope you’re surviving well. I’ve missed you!